Spotting the Early Signs of a Leader’s Wellbeing Slipping

And What You Can Do as an Employee to Help

Most organisations have invested heavily in employee wellbeing. Support lines, mental health first aiders, wellbeing days, flexible working. All brilliant, all needed.

But there’s a gap that often goes unnoticed, leaders.

Leaders are expected to absorb pressure, make calm decisions, hold the team together, and stay strong even when everything around them is shifting. Yet when their wellbeing slips, it affects everyone. Stress isn’t contained at the top, it spreads.

Employees are usually the first to feel it. You see their mood change. Their pace shift. Their energy dip. You’re part of their daily rhythm, so you notice what others miss.

Spotting the early signs isn’t about fixing your leader. It’s about protecting your team culture, your performance, and your working environment.

Here’s how to recognise those early signs, and what you can do, safely and respectfully, to support them.

1. The early signs a leader’s wellbeing is slipping

Leaders rarely say, “I’m struggling”. Instead, their behaviour changes in small but consistent ways. Look for patterns rather than one-off moments.

Behaviour changes

• They become quieter or more withdrawn
  Their tone becomes shorter, flatter or more irritable
  They lose interest in conversations or team moments
  Their usual sense of humour or spark disappears

Work pattern changes

• Regular late-night emails or weekend messages
  No real breaks, working through lunch
  Cancelling time off or refusing help
  Taking back tasks they had delegated

Emotional or physical signs

• Tired eyes and visible tension
  Slumped posture or low energy
  Hesitation with decisions
  Noticeable overwhelm

When two or more of these show up regularly, something is going on beneath the surface.

2. Why this matters to you as an employee

A struggling leader affects:

Team stability
Decision-making becomes inconsistent.

Communication
Messages feel sharper, slower, or unclear.

Culture
Tension spreads quickly when the person holding everything together starts showing strain.

Workload
Leaders who stop delegating create bottlenecks and pressure points.

Supporting a leader early isn’t managing them.
It’s safeguarding your working environment.

3. How to help, without overstepping

Your role isn’t to diagnose, fix, or intrude.
It’s to offer small, respectful signals of support.

Start with a gentle, human observation

“Things seem intense lately, hope you’re holding up alright”.

It’s soft. It’s private. It’s kind.

Offer practical, not personal, help

“I can take X off your plate if you need space this week.”
“We’ve got Y handled, so feel free to step back when you need to.”

Leaders often hide stress because they don’t want to burden their team. Practical offers create permission.

Reassure them the team is solid

One of the biggest fears leaders carry is, “If I step back, everything will fall apart.”

A simple line helps more than you think.
“Don’t worry, we’ve got this covered.”

Model the behaviour you want to encourage

Healthy habits spread in every direction.

Take breaks.
Log off on time.
Respect your boundaries.
It gives leaders permission to respect theirs.

4. How to approach a leader safely and respectfully

This is where many employees freeze, worried about crossing a boundary.

Here’s the safest approach:

Keep it private: not in a meeting, not in front of colleagues.
Keep it light: avoid emotional probing.
Keep it practical: focus on work impact, not personal details.

Avoid phrases like:

• “You look stressed”
• “You’re not yourself”
• “You need to take a break”

These can feel accusatory or patronising.

Stick to:

• “If there’s anything I can pick up this week, shout”
• “We’re here to help if you need it”

Support the behaviour, not the personal details.

5. When to respect their privacy

Not every observation needs a conversation.

Respect their privacy when:

• They change the subject
• They give short, closed answers
• They look uncomfortable
• The issue is clearly personal
• You’re tempted to guess or gossip

Silence can be as supportive as action.

6. When to involve HR (rare, but important)

Escalation is only for serious, sustained concerns, such as:

• extreme or prolonged stress
• emotional volatility
• clear signs of burnout
• behaviour that risks team wellbeing or safety

This isn’t reporting someone.
It’s protecting them and the team.

7. The quick “Do and Don’t” guide

Do:

• Spot early patterns
• Offer practical support
• Keep conversations private
• Reassure them
• Model healthy boundaries

Don’t:

• Diagnose
• Push personal questions
• Gossip
• Shame them for struggling
• Make assumptions

8. The bigger picture

Healthy leadership is a shared responsibility.

You can’t carry their load, but you can create the kind of environment where they don’t feel they have to carry it alone. Leaders who feel supported make better decisions, build calmer cultures, and communicate more clearly. That benefits everyone.

Spot the signs early.
Support with kindness.
Respect their space.
Help create a culture where everyone’s wellbeing matters, including the people leading the way.

My Final Thoughts – Putting This into Action

This guide is designed to help employees recognise early signs of strain and support their leaders in a healthy, respectful way. It isn’t a diagnostic tool, and it isn’t a replacement for professional mental health advice. Every situation is different, and no one should feel pressured to take on responsibility beyond their role or comfort level.

If you’re ever unsure, keep conversations light, keep them private, and focus on practical support rather than personal detail. If a leader shows serious or sustained signs of distress, it’s appropriate to raise concerns confidentially with HR so they can offer the right support.

Everyone’s wellbeing matters. Leaders deserve the same care and consideration that employees receive, and small, respectful actions can make a meaningful difference to the culture you work in.